Discover more from Amor Dei, Amor Mundi
Dear Reader,
Kicking the dust off the ol’ substack here, as 2024 kicks into gear.
As Gallagher once said, I’m not here to tell you jokes, I’m here to sell you something. This week marks the launch of Land of My Sojourn: The Landscape of a Faith Lost and Found. The book is part-memoir, part spiritual reading of the lives of Peter and Elijah, and is ultimately about how the death of our dreams is a means of grace.
It is not the book I set out to write. Far from it.
In fact, the book I planned to write was going to be a reflection what the Sermon on the Mount might have to say about our public witness. That was the book I pitched to the fine folks at IVP, and it was the book I tried to write for about three years. But those years were strange and disorienting, and I spent much of that time unable to distinguish up from down. Writing wasn’t so much blocked as it was stilted, unproductive, and uninspired.
That was, in many ways, reflective of my soul at the time as well. Along with the upheavals of post-2016 politics, I was experiencing my own spiritual upheavals in a church going through a period of painful transitions and conflicts. Writing about the possibility of a more beautiful way of public witness was difficult when so much that surrounded me wasn’t just ugly, but painful.
Somewhere in the midst of those years, I found myself reflecting on the life of Peter in the gospels — the character arc that leads him from being the bold one at Caesarea Phillippi to denying knowing Jesus the night of his crucifixion. I particularly found myself drawn to the Transfiguration, and to Peter’s request, “Lord, shall I make three shelters for you?”
That moment in particular become more and more poignant, because it revealed a Peter who wasn’t just brash and temperamental, but who was making a request like a child in a moment of intense joy and love. “I wish this would never end. Can we make it last a little longer? Can we just stay here?”
I think for many who have experienced church hurt and spiritual disillusionment, that’s a familiar sentiment. I know it is familiar to me. Spiritual community can feel like you’re living in a liminal space between this world and the next, with the divine Presence a breath away — whether you’re gathered in worship or gathered over a dinner table or at a pub with your dearest friends. The desire to make that last forever, is profound, and it can override your good sense.
I think for Peter, that encounter with glory (along with many others) had a way of eclipsing the warning signs and looming shadows that were also part and parcel of Jesus’ ministry. When they left the mount of transfiguration, for instance, in short order they heard Jesus predict his death once again, and they encountered a demon-possessed child who had been throwing himself in the fire all his life. Imagine the visual image of the scarred and wounded child — a kind of walking emblem of death and cursedness. Jesus heals him, of course, but it is a reminder of the unfinished nature of Jesus’ glory — that indeed, they couldn’t just stay there at the top of the mountain.
By the end of the gospels — particularly the end of the book of John — Peter is transformed. No longer will he wield the sword; instead, he’s prepared to follow Jesus unto death. But the path that gets him there is full of humiliation, denial, and an experience with the miserable silence of God.
This story came to obsess me — even more so when I saw the ways that it mirrored the life of Elijah (who, you’ll recall, was also present for the transfiguration). And so, the Sermon on the Mount book went on the shelf, and this one took the front seat.
Throughout, I talk about my own parallels. Idealism. The hope inspired by people like Billy Graham or my Grandfather, Sam Cooley. The idealism and dream-state that sets in with ministry success. The incredibly disorienting experience of having your community fall apart. And encounters with the death of a friend and the death of my father that transformed how I think about all of it. The biggest surprise of the book is the final chapter, which is titled “Land of My Sojourn: I’m Still Here.” By God’s grace, I’m still a part of this ragamuffin community, and happy to be here.
If the book interests you at all, check it out and please consider pre-ordering it. It really helps people find the book.
Louisville people — you can preorder with Carmichael’s Bookstore.
You can also order at Hearts and Minds Books, where the wonder Byron Borger wrote of the book:
I was given an early version of this and when the time was right I inhaled it. I read every paragraph, many twice, and couldn’t believe how good it was. I cried and laughed and sighed and shook my head. I wanted to cuss and I wanted to praise God. Okay, I did both.
(Thank you Byron — that means the world to me.)
And for everyone else, here’s the Amazon link and Barnes and Noble link.
Varia
Along with the book, I’ve had a busy month of publishing and releasing other projects.
I wrote the cover story to the March issue of CT, exploring the ideology behind the October 7th massacres and the Hamas apologists and sympathizers emerging in the West.
We also launched Promised Land, a limited series about the Israel-Palestine conflict.
I met Rob Reiner and we discussed his Christian Nationalism film. While I think the film suffers (at times) from misunderstanding evangelicals, I think our conversation was very insightful — especially his willingness to acknowledge overreach on rhetoric employed towards the likes of Mitt Romney and George W. Bush.
We also recently launched a CT project that’s been in development for a long time: Being Human with Steve Cuss. Start at the beginning for a great, deep dive into anxiety, reactivity, and healthier presence.
More to come — including a story I’m excited about publishing soon at Acton, an article about Galileo and Mars Hill at Comment Magazine, and various podcast appearances in support of my book.
Speaking of which — want me to come on your podcast? Or to talk at your church or event? Fill out a request at those links, or else get in touch here.
Thanks for reading — and I’ll be back much sooner than last time. Promise!
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Christianity, culture, and faithful presence. Haunted by Hannah Arendt. "Love is the original miracle." — Guy Garvey